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The Top 13 Reasons Jerry Falwell Thinks Your Favorite TV Character is Gay
Tinky Winky Waves Hi! Author Unknown Fonzie: has an "office" in the men’s room and always tells guys to "sit on it." If you’re drunk enough, "Homer Simpson" sounds kinda like "homosexual." Popeye:...
View ArticleHickbonics/English Dictionary
Author Unknown HEIDI – (noun): Greeting. HIRE YEW: Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting. Usage: Heidi, Hire yew?" BARD – (verb): Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow." Usage: "My brother bard my...
View ArticleThe Laws of Work
Author Unknown A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt. After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before. Anyone can do any...
View ArticleHow To Write A Recommendation Letter That You Don’t Really Mean
by Uri Dub THE PROBLEM Having to write letters of recommendation for people with very dubious qualifications can cause serious legal troubles in a time when laws have eroded the confidentiality of...
View ArticleThings You Learn About Computers In The Movies…
Author Unknown Word processors never display a cursor. You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences. All monitors display 2 inch high letters. High-tech computers, such as those used...
View ArticleNew Office Lingo
Author Unknown Adminisphere: Middle Management: the rarified organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate...
View ArticleWhat Your Resume Really Means
Author Unknown I Take Pride In My Work: I blame others for my mistakes. I’m Adaptable: I’ve changed jobs a lot. I’m Extremely Adept At All Manner Of Office Organization: I can make my own coffee. I’m...
View ArticleA Women’s Glossary
Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you’re right, but he just hasn’t realized it yet. Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman....
View ArticleNeologisms and New Words Dictionary: M-Z
Author Unknown Neologisms are alternate meanings for common words – a few of those, plus some new words from old ones. Marinating In: a belief system that your stewing in example: "After mom said I was...
View ArticleNew List of Appropriate Language For Work
author unknown It has been brought to the Management’s attention that some individuals have been using foul language in the course of normal conversation between employees. Due to complaints from some...
View ArticleNew Medical Leave and Related Company Policies
author unknown SICKNESS: We will no longer accept a doctor’s statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work. OPERATIONS: Operations are now banned. As...
View ArticleSystematic Buzz Phrase Projector
Those of us used to writing technical and business reports know how difficult it can be to use just the right phrase to convey the true depth of your topic. Now, professionals and students alike can...
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Laffy Taffy Jokes (the worst jokes in the world)
material provided by the femmes de la grassy knoll (aka my sister & her friends) who were kind enough to eat an entire bag of Laffy Taffy candy (get a bag of your own from Amazon.com!) just to...
View ArticleWhat Is An Irishman?
Author Unknown An Irishman is a man who… May not believe there is a God, but is darn sure of the infallibility of the Pope. Won’t eat meat on Friday, but will drink Jameson for breakfast. Has great...
View ArticleRepublicans Announce Convention Event Schedule
Courtesy of Rich Procter at The Smirking Chimp: The following is the “first final” list of events for the Republican National Convention in New York City, August 30 to September 2. AUGUST 30 6 p.m. –...
View ArticleNeologisms and New Words Dictionary: A – L
Author Unknown Neologisms are alternate meanings for common words – a few of those, plus some new words from old ones. Accordionated (ah kor’ de on ay tid) adj. Being able to drive and fold a road map...
View ArticleYou Know You Work for An American Corporation When…
Author Unknown You sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro It’s dark when you drive to and from work Fun is when...
View ArticleHow Does a Chicken Cross the Road?
Author Unknown NT Chicken: Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure. OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed. Win 95 Chicken:...
View ArticleThe Top 20 Reasons Dogs Don’t Use Computers
Author Unknown 20. Can’t stick their heads out of Windows ’95. 19. Fetch command not available on all platforms. 18. Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side. 17. Too difficult to...
View ArticleHow to Sing the Blues
A Primer For Beginners Author Unknown 1. Most blues begin with "Woke up this morning." 2. "I got a good woman" is a bad way to begin the blues, unless you stick something nasty in the next line, such...
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